Santa Claus is Coming to … Oak Ridge, Roatan?

Yep, it’s definitely too hot here for reindeer. But that doesn’t mean that Santa doesn’t come. He just does it Roatan-style.

On Christmas Eve, Corinne, Matt, and I took little Archer into Oak Ridge for Santa Claus’ annual visit. It was quite the adventure.

We were running a little late (normal for Matt) but sped out of Port Royal determined not to miss Santa. We zipped into the Oak Ridge canal and the slip at BJ’s with just a little time to spare. I hopped out of the boat and pulled her bow close to the dock. Matt reached around to reverse the engine to bring her backend to the dock, but he accidentally accelerated instead. In a mad burst, the boat slammed forward, tilted dangerously to one side, and crashed into the dock bar. Corinne and Archer were thrown backward and landed on the floor of the boat. Matt was almost tossed into the water. I stood there stupidly with my eyes bulging out of my head. When the throttle was released and we all calmed down, we were happy to find that everyone was OK. BJ’s dock got the worst of it.

It was a close one and a scary experience. Apparently, there is a reason everyone around here calls Matt “Mash-Up.” But we were all fine. And at the age of 1, Archer has now survived a stabbing and a boat wreck. What a tough little kid!

After crashing the boat, we needed a beer, so we headed inside BJ’s for a cold one while we waited for Santa. It wasn’t long before we heard the telltale screams of little kids cascading down the canal. Santa was coming! Santa was coming!!!

We ran outside to see Santa and his helpers (human and canine) approaching in a skiff. Here’s a couple of short videos of his arrival.





Santa greeted all the little children and handed out bags of chips and candy. He was jolly, loaded with goodies, and just a little drunk. He was also dressed for the weather in short pants and sandals.

After Santa left, we downed our beers and prepared to head back to Port Royal. As we were paying our tab, Santa’s helper returned for a vodka on ice. BJ gladly fulfilled the order on the house.

Full of holiday cheer, we all jumped back in the boat and pushed off the dock. And then … nothing. The engine wouldn’t start.

As we floated further and further from the dock and down the canal toward Jonesville, Matt tinkered with the motor. Still nothing. Corinne finally hailed a passing skiff and asked for a tow. A 10-year-old boy kindly obliged and pulled us safely back to BJ’s in a boat named Unexpected. How appropriate.

And what a great holiday adventure! Merry Christmas from Roatan!

Happy Holidays from Roatan!

So it turns out that it’s kind of hard to get in the holiday spirit when it’s 80 degrees and you’re dressed in a bikini and snorkeling fins. That probably doesn’t sound too bad for all of you in the States (where I hear it has been below 0 on a regular basis), but I do personally miss the warm, cheesy, sappy holiday traditions back home. So I’m trying to get in the spirit.

A couple of weeks ago, I put up two Christmas trees in the lodge restaurant. I thought it would help us get in the holiday mood. The trees are really cute and are adorned with island-appropriate ornaments. But for the most part, they just look funny. Here are a few pictures from the tropical tree:




And here are some of the pirate tree (you know how I love pirates):


We’ve also been listening to some Christmas music on the satellite radio, but it all just seems wrong. Although I hadn’t thought much about it before, I’ve realized that Christmas music is really cold climate-centric. All this talk about sweaters, snow, fireplaces, and reindeer … We don’t have any of that on Roatan.

Even the food doesn’t work for well us. The past few days, I’ve whipped up a few batches of toffee, peanut butter balls, and fudge (some of my family’s traditional holidays candies), but as soon as I take them out of the freezer, they begin to melt in the heat and humidity.

But we’re still trying. Last night, Driftwood, a sailboat that is currently moored in front of our restaurant dock, was lit up with Christmas lights. That made me smile.


Tonight, we’re having a Christmas Eve happy hour event on our neighbor’s over-the-water palapa bar. And tomorrow, we’re having all the gringos in the harbor (and all of the visiting sailboaters) over for a big Christmas potluck dinner. Beforehand, we’ll watch my favorite Christmas movie: A Christmas Story. Santa thoughtfully sent me a copy last week via air parcel service. I think it’s just too hot here for the reindeer.

When It Rains, It Pours

No joke. It really lets loose.

Here's a shot from 8:30 this morning just outside the office door. It was raining so hard that our satellite internet went out (again).

Howlin’ at the Moon

On Saturday, the moon popped over the horizon and lit up the whole harbor. You could see for miles.

It also seemed to get those glowing fish going again. The water around Royal Playa (where we were visiting for a barbeque) was filled with little swirling, glowing circles.

Pretty cool.

A Quickie Vacation

Terry and Patrice, the owners of the lodge, left this weekend after a 2-month stay. Seeing the end was near, we took advantage of the opportunity to get the hell out of Dodge and head down island with Matt, Corrine, and Archer (our neighbors and longtime friends) for a night of debauchery.

We started the adventure in West End, which is the nightlife hotspot of the island. Unfortunately, it was a Wednesday and quite dead, but it was a treat to us “East Enders” anyway. We don’t have any bars or restaurants to speak of in our part of the island, so just getting to order from a menu and see other gringos was fun.

Here’s a photo of the Royal Playa fam at Sundowners, a beach bar that’s popular with all the expats.

After happy-hour drinks, we headed down the sand road to Pura Vida for some Italian. We shared some fried mozzarella, calamari, and pizza, and Archer got his own plate of butter noodles.

Actually, that’s not quite true. Archer shared his dinner, too, albeit with some uninvited guests.

Afterward, we drove to West Bay and checked in to Infinity Bay. The hotel was quite luxurious and a splurge for us all, but it had air conditioning and cable TV. We spent the evening watching a goofy Christmas movie.

The next morning, we awoke to a nasty storm. The winds were howling, the rain was falling, and the waves were huge! Here’s a short video of the giganto waves crashing against the West Bay cliffs.

We curled up to indulge in some more TV (which none of us has back in Port Royal) and surfed between sports, CNN, a gruesome historical flick, and the Disney Channel. After another meal out and numerous stops to take care of miscellaneous errands, we headed back home, happy and relaxed.

Kobi Kabana

Kobi has been here almost 3 weeks now, and she’s settling in nicely.

She has found and made good use of the freshwater stream that runs through the grounds, and she has befriended (almost all of) the staff. I think they all like having her around and are most impressed by her furriness. (The local children chanted “Tigre! Tigre!” when we first brought her home. She is a huge contrast to the local short-haired, underfed island dogs.) Last week, I caught the fishing guides sharing their sandwiches with her at lunch. Unfortunately, she still barks mercilessly at Ana, our new cook, and Sailor, the resort dog, is still jealous.

Regardless, I’m very happy to have her here.

Blue Friday

Yes, it was a week ago. Yes, I’m slow. Nevertheless …

While you were fighting hoards of coupon-carrying scrooges through malls and big-box stores in the chaos known as Black Friday, I was munching a leftover-turkey sandwich and gathering seashells for my Christmas tree here.


The Pigeon Cayes are just about my favorite spot around Roatan. They are two tiny, sandy, palm-spotted islands in the ocean off the eastern end.

And they are postcard-perfect. Just beautiful!

(By the way, the photo I use in my blog header is also a photo from Pigeon Cayes. I took that one this spring. It shows two of the lodge's skiffs as well as our neighbors' skiff, which is dubbed "The Battleship.")